Is the Honeymoon Over?

By the middle of the fall semester some freshmen start to realize that college classes are harder that they expected, their roommate’s once innocuous habits are more annoying than they thought they would be, and the dining hall food is starting to get a little too predictable. In other words, the honeymoon is over. This is a typical setback that many students face at about this time of year. If you think that your child is feeling a little down about college in general, rest assured that he’s not alone, and there are things that can be done to revitalize his campus experience before the end of the semester.

• Recommit to classes. This includes attending every class, even when it’s cold outside in the morning! Also, remind him that just because many other students have started to slip behind in class assignments and readings doesn’t mean that he can. Suggest he make a pledge to catch up on class work and set aside a few evenings or an entire weekend to spend in the library doing just that. Remind him that having fun is just fine as long as he’s finished his work first!

• Find a “happy place” on campus. Sometimes students just need to take a mental vacation from the hustle and bustle of college life. Students who find a quiet, peaceful place, or a few, on campus can use their time there to mentally regroup each day. This habit makes it easier to handle the little ups and downs that life will throw at them. a quiet corner of the library, some headphones, and twenty minutes of time is often enough to relax and recharge.

• Get a full night’s sleep. College students almost never get enough sleep. A full eight hour rest is rare especially if they are constantly awakened throughout the night by texts and tweets. Suggest that your student get to bed an hour earlier than he now does and recommend that he either turn off his phone or leave it in a place where it will not disturb his sleep.

• Too far to come home. If your student attends college too far from home for a weekend visit, maybe you can meet somewhere in the middle. Students seem to love a weekend at a hotel where they leave their cares behind on campus and focus on studying, sleeping and enjoying a few hearty meals with family. 

Is Your Child a "First Generation" College Student?

Each college will have it’s own definition of a first generation student, but usually, If your child is the first in your family to attend college they are considered “first generation”. Some campuses even extend this title to students whose parents or other family members attended college, but did not graduate. Whatever the definition, first generation college students universally experience stress, a feeling of being an outsider on campus, and the burden of being the trailblazer for their entire family.

For first generation parents it’s important not to be intimidated by college, and the best way to do this is to learn as much as you can about your child’s college and where he can go for help if he needs it. Almost all colleges have handbooks for students and many have parent handbooks as well. Find copies of these books, read them thoroughly, and keep them handy. College websites are also wonderful resources for first generation parents.

For most students, having a parent or family member take an interest in their education and being willing to listen and find out more about their college is half the battle. First generation parents don’t have to know all, or any, of the answers to their child’s questions they just have to know how to help find the answers. The first step in this process is having your child clarify the question. You may think that asking him more questions is the last thing he needs now, but it’s the best way to pinpoint the potential problem and start working on a solution.

Keep in mind that as your child is learning, this is also a great learning experience for you too. Take advantage of programs on campus or parent networks that can help ease these transitions for you and your child and never be afraid to ask questions.